Heres To You Micheal (my last entry in Micheal)

Saturday Night, October 16,2004

Things just haven't been going my way. Theres so many things i can't change. Im going crazy about it.

I knew by the way today was going, it wasn't going to be the best day that i'll have. I woke up just wanting comfort, trying to shut out all the things that's been annoying me, knowing that i cant change anything. All i had was Thomas, Jerry, and you. So i put on Thomas, turned up Jerry, and laid there wanting to hold you, but feeling I shouldn't. I haven't held you since June.

I just hit my breaking point. tired and annoyed and lazy, with things to do that i have to do. This stuff refusing to be washed off my face beacuase i left it on to long, things falling out the cabinet as i'm trying to take the aluminum foil out to wrap the food with, and the static in my radio preventing me from enjoying "i've got to prase you like i should." i juat knelt down and cried, repeating "just dont statis, please, just dont static", and crying till my head hurt.

now this is my last entry in you and i'm like i am. i'm a complete mess and i need someone to guide me and your the only one it seems i can turn to. i'm sure your flattered but feel sorry for me. but anyway, i need guidence but i only have the otherside of this page left in you.

now i know why i couldn't bear to touch you after your pages started running out. i want to end you happily. i want to write a few lyrics that always make me happy; i hope i can remember some...for you.

"you've been the only thing thats right, in all i've done"

"every breath that is in you is in your lungs is a tiny little gift to me is a tiny little gift to me"

"my friends are so depressed, i feel the question of your lonliness, confide... cause ill be on your side, you know i will, you know i will"

"and i know one thing is true, that we are just as cool, and coool kids, well they belong, together"

"i'm so happy, cause today i found my friends, their in my head" THANKS FOR BEING THERE

saturday night i fell asleep with Micheal in my arms

and tears down my face. i think thats all i have to say...